You can say no.
You can say no to people, ya know.
You can say no to plans, activities, requests, "obligations" or anything else for that matter that is asked of you in order to protect your energy.
You don't have to go to that family function. You don't have to maintain a relationship with that toxic person just because you've known them forever. You don't have to babysit your friend's shitty dog while they go on vacation. You don't have to cover that shift at work. You don't have to bleed out for anyone, at any time, for any reason, EVER.
YOU CAN SAY NO.
And you should say no! As a recovering people pleaser, I used to say yes to everything. Even when I knew that I was going to be miserable the whole time. But I felt bad saying no. I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I didn't want anyone to be inconvenienced. So, they go on swimmingly, completely oblivious, and I'm over here just suffering.
You are the only person that can protect your heart and your energy. Give yourself permission to say no. Put the needs, comfort, safety, and happiness of YOU above anyone else. You'll be surprised at how well you can love other people when you love yourself first.
"To protect your energy-
It's ok to cancel a commitment.
It's ok to not answer a call.
It's ok to change your mind.
It's ok to want to be alone.
It's ok to take a day off.
It's ok to do nothing.
It's ok to speak up.
It's ok to let go. "
(I didn't write that, but I love it.)
Reflect or journal on a few examples when you said yes when you most definitely should have said no.
Begin exercising your right to say no. Boundaries are the very best form of self-love.
You can do it.
I'm cheering for you.