I love lists.
Grocery lists, shopping lists, to-do lists. Tell me to make a list and I am a happy girl.
I started working with a coach and he instructed me to make a "100 Things" list about myself. He gave me some prompts and some ideas, but I didn't use them. I just sat down and started typing. It took me almost 4 hours over the course of 2 days.
It's basically just an expanded version of the first day of the Self-Reflection Journaling Project. But, 100 is a lot of things to write about yourself. (I think I'll edit the 7DJP for future participants and make them do 100.) Anyway, you should do it. Just for funsies. Send it to me if you want. Or send me some of the ones that surprised you. I would love to hear what comes up for you. :)
Here are a few of the juicy ones from my list:
6. I am a happy and joyful person. But my mind is super dark sometimes. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety at age 15 and was treated by family like I was a ticking emotional time bomb. I’m struggling now with deciding if I actually have a chemical imbalance that contributes to depression or if the conditioning of being diagnosed/medicated/treated for depression made me depressed. What do other people’s minds sound like in their head?
9. I was so happy when my ex-husband cheated on me. It meant I had an out and didn't have to feel guilty for leaving the marriage.
10. Most of the grief I felt when my marriage ended was more about how I felt ashamed of being divorced, not over leaving my husband.
18. I am so in love with Jesus but I am disenfranchised with the Christian church. Some of the best experiences I've had are with people I know that don’t practice christianity and some of the worst experiences I've had are with people that do.
23. I am addicted to my phone and I fucking hate it. Sometimes I get lost scrolling and then I feel like shit for hours afterwards. But I do it anyway, even though I know i am going to feel like shit.
28. I used to hate children and was so closed off to the idea of ever having them. I realize now, that I have only ever been with shitty men that would make shitty fathers and that's why I didn't want children. I didn't treat my body well and I told myself for years I wouldn't make a good mother. I wonder if I’ve karmically hurt my chances at getting pregnant. Because I actually think I would make a fantastic mother.
39. I used to cry all the time. there was a period of more than 8 months where I cried every single day. My emotional baseline was just one step above tears, so if anything rocked my boat, I would always cry. If I was sad or overwhelmed, or angry or scared or frustrated, I would cry. But I was never a happy crier. Thats changed now. I cry happy tears all the time.
66. Learning about the spirituality and science of yoga gave me so much hope. I was so frustrated with organized religion and had been just trying to find my own path to God. Turns out, God is actually inside you and the church doesn't really want you to know that.
69. Sometimes I feel guilty that all of my prayers are being answered and all of my dreams are coming true.
74. I used to smoke a shit ton of weed. Now, i just smoke a little bit of weed.
88. “Give Zero Fucks” has been the most transformative mindset I have ever come across.
You are a magical collection of cells, and every single experience you have ever had in your whole life is so valid and contributes to the creation of what makes you so wonderful. Look at every part of you. You are gem, so explore every facet of you who are you. Even the not-so-pretty parts.
The world is waiting for you to shine your light, but you have to know yourself first.