Healing does not feel good. And if you believe that it’s supposed to feel good then you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of suffering.
Because if you get to the point that you recognize that you need healing and then you start taking steps to work towards that moving target, you will stumble early on and give up. A soon as it starts feeling unpleasant.
Before you even start the journey, understanding that healing does not feel good is so absolutely necessary and the only thing that will keep you on your path.
Physical, emotional, mental or internal. Healing. Does. Not. Feel. Good.
Healing does however, feel different than causing harm. So, it’s a different felt sensation in the body than whatever you’ve experienced in the past.
I understood all of this in my mind as a concept before I started my recent trek into healing my belly. But over the last few days, I have actually experienced with my body this notion that healing doesn’t feel good.
(The quickest and easiest way to learn is to first understand something in the mind as a concept or idea, and then have an actual felt experience in the body that solidifies your understanding of whatever that concept is. More on that in another post.)
What I have learned is that in an attempt to save me from suffering, my brain turned off the connection to my belly. So basically over the last 2 decades, I haven’t been able to actually feel what was happening in my belly.
I noticed symptoms, but I had no neurological understanding of the intensity of what was going on in my body.
When I started my journey into healing my body, I set the intention to learn about myself more thoroughly. I began taking steps but still couldn't fully feel what was happening.
But almost 2 weeks ago, the whole belly and digestive system just came back online, in an instant, out of nowhere.
It was as if someone plugged in the electrical connection from the belly to the brain.
And that shit hurt, man. And it still hurts.
But if you can sit with the pain, if you can honor and respect the body as it repairs the damage, you will be rewarded tenfold.
The only thing worse than feeling pain is feeling nothing at all.
Keep going. You’re doing a great work.